Ancient Technique For Dealing With "TOXIC People"

We hear it all the time in spiritual circles...

Relationships are our greatest teachers. 

I would have to agree and add,

especially the challenging ones! 

If this is something you've been experiencing in your own life then this blog post will share an OLD but powerful technique that has really helped me in this regard...

I've been waking up every morning and reading Marcus Aurelius's "Meditations."

Such a humble, inspiring, and brilliant man from a LONG time ago! Something like 250 AD.

Meditations was basically a journal he wrote for himself, never intending to become published. I almost think this makes it better, he wasn't writing for an audience.

Anyways he said something this morning the stuck with me... (& really helped me deal with some of the challenging folks in my own life)

"In this world, there is only one thing of value, to live out your life in truth and justice, tolerant of those who are neither true, nor just."

For the first half of my life, anytime life would bring me a difficult person, I'd blame them for my emotional reactions... frustration, anger, overall resistance, all their fault. 

I would rehash whatever story or scenario to my friends and they would see the injustice and reaffirm my resentment. 

However, after my spiritual awakening

I started to see, quite clearly, undeniably, just how toxic and self destructive that anger/resentment energy is, regardless of who's to blame. 

It's sometimes difficult though, is it not?

To let something go, when you were so clearly wronged.

It doesn't matter, as I'm sure you've also discovered...

that energy feels the same in our body regardless,

For me it disrupts every aspect of my life!

It distracts and somewhat separates me from my dear family. I can be sitting in the room with them, but if I'm stewing, I'm not really there.

It blocks my creative energy, preventing me from writing to all of you wonderful people! It disturbs my sleep, impacts my health.

So what if I'm right and they are wrong! Who's the one losing sleep?

For years, I've understood this intellectually but never had the ability to actually manage & release that toxic physical resentment energy. 

Marcus Aurelius's simple quote and philosophy has been perhaps the only effective method for noticeably diffusing it. 

Striving to live an honest and just life... (even if it's not reciprocated). 

Also, once in a while, when I'm in a REALLY good place...

I see challenging people as possibly my soul mates here to teach ME a lesson!

In fact, when I'm really upset with someone a lot of the time it's because I see too much of myself in them!

The world is full of crazies that don't phase me in the slightest... but this person who said this one thing drives me up a wall? 

I think sometimes these folks are like mirrors, reality check points, opportunities to look more deeply at ourselves. 

The truth is, presently, I am still very far from where I'd prefer to be with this lol

But I can honestly say I have come to form an appreciation for the challenge! 

There is such a wonderful and light feeling in my body when I am able, through my own spiritual practice, through my own "internal" work, to let something go and forgive.

Some of my greatest spiritual breakthroughs in fact have come on the other side of forgiveness, perhaps explaining why it's sometimes so difficult! haha

Good day to you my friend!

Until next time, 

Sincerely, 

Victor